Made in britain

After a whole 5 days of snow, our country has basically gone into melt down (pun not intended). And along with the lack of readiness for any weather, it got me thinking as to what else it means to be British. American readers take note!

1. The weather

Obviously I've touched on it already but the weather takes up an abnormal amount of time for a British person.We don't like it when it's too cold, we don't like it when it rains, we don't like it when it snows but we also don't like it when it's hot because then it's too hot. No matter what the weathers doing, we're worrying about it, talking about it and tweeting about it non-stop.

2. We don't leave home without an umbrella

On the back of our unpredictable weather, we don't go anywhere without an umbrella. Even if it's 30 degrees and the sun is shining, if you don't take an umbrella then you can guarantee a downpour. Better to be safe than sorry!

3. Our biggest political debate is what this is called

Seriously, wars have been started over disagreements as to what to call it. Some options include bread roll, bap, bun, teacake, barm cake and muffin. But if you're a real winner in life, then you know that it's called a cob.

4. The hurdles of small talk

Brits don't excel at small talk. We all greet each other with 'how are you' or 'you alright' but even if you were on the verge of death, any response other than good/yes are you, would be met with a look of horror. Also, we get stuck in the loop of 'how are you' 'good thanks you?' 'good thanks you?' more often than we'd like to admit.

5. Tea

Tea is not so much a drink in Britain but a way of life. Illnesses have been fixed with a cup of tea, friendships have been formed at new jobs by offering to make a tea round and the pressure of making someone a tea for the first time is massive. There's also big debate about the correct way to make a tea. FYI, it's tea bag in, hot water in, tea bag out, sugar in (if applicable), milk in, stir. You milk-first people are a disgrace.

6. We excel at passive aggression

If a stranger is annoying you or in your way, instead of just saying things plainly, we Brits like to be more passive aggressive than that. A loud tut or cough usually does the trick or if someone really pisses you off, saying 'excuse me' with emphasis on the 'cu' sound, that's basically British for 'fuck you'.

7. Public transport is a minefield

For a start, we avoid sitting next to each other at all costs. I've been on buses in America and strangers just sit next to each other and start chatting. In Britain, we don't even like making eye contact with strangers. And if you do end up sitting next to someone or with someone sitting next to you on a bus or train, we spend the rest of the journey working out how we'll get out or waiting for the other person to. FYI, the correct way to do this is to excessively shift around with your bag and coat to make sure the person next to you knows you want to get out, and then basically whisper 'sorry can I just- excuse me- sorry'.

8. We wait all year for bank holiday

Despite the fact that we get 52 weekends in the year and can easily go out every Friday and Saturday night, when bank holiday weekend comes around, we feel it totally necessary to drink from 5pm on the Friday to the bitter end of Sunday. In a beer garden is even better. 

9. We take queuing seriously

We queue for everything and very religiously too. There's no stronger connection than that of everyone else in the queue when someone pushes in; it's just not the done thing.

10. We will eat chips with everything

Chips with gravy, chips with cheese, chips with curry sauce. It's a very important food group.

11. We're really good at faking it

Most people either argue with people they don't like or completely avoid them but not us, we just plaster on a smile. We're all for being civil and the famous British politeness seems to override any other emotions or opinions.

12. We have meals for certain days of the week

Sunday roast, fish and chip Fridays, pizza thursdays - we just seem to love theming our food with days of the week. I would've included taco tuesdays but I don't think I can pass that as British culture some how.

13. It's all about the north vs the south

I think this is one that mostly comes up at uni but there are big debates about what we call things (lunch and dinner or dinner and tea), how we pronounce things (scone or scone) and what certain words mean (is a teacake something with dried fruit that you eat toasted with butter or is it a marshmallow biscuit covered in chocolate). And if like me, you're from the Midlands, you get the pleasure of having half Northern views and half Southern, meaning that neither will claim you as their own!